Several years ago, I attended a conference in Denver, Colorado. During one of the breakouts, the speaker, Jim Wideman, made a statement that has resonated with me until this day.  He said,

“If you were to leave your ministry today, would it fall apart? If so, you were a lousy children’s minister. You did not do your job.”

Well, if you are like me, I didn’t take that too well.

It reminded me of the first church where I served.

I was a perfectionist, and no one could do the work as good as I could.

For three years, “I” grew the ministry. When I left, like Brother Jim said, it fell apart.

Sadly, I learned a big lesson at this first church.

Instead of pouring my life into other leaders and kids, I did it all myself.

Years later, I was at a church in Corpus Christi, Texas.

I was over the whole children’s ministry from birth to sixth grade.

I had a preschool director who was like me at my first church—a perfectionist. No one could do the ministry good enough.

She walked in one day, gave her two-week notice, and the rest was history.

People said she did an amazing job as the preschool director.

But for those of us who were left behind to pick up the pieces, it was as if a tsunami had rolled through and destroyed everything.

It took us a year to put things back together and get the ministry running again.

So, I personally made that mistake at a church, and then I had a staff member do the same thing to me.

I realize now that I and this person were both lousy children’s leaders.

So, here are my suggestions:

Look at what God’s Word says your role is in the church. 

Paul spells it out in Ephesians 4:11-12,  

^“And He Himself gave some to be apostles, some prophets, some evangelists, and some pastors and teachers, for the equipping of the saints for the work of ministry, for the edifying of the body of Christ.”

Your role—my role—is to equip.

Equip the saints for works of ministry—not do all of the ministry yourself.

You could be sinning against the body of Christ by hindering the works of ministry at your church.

You also rob children and leaders of opportunities to use their spiritual gifts.

I highly recommend that you consider the following:

1. Make a list of jobs someone else could do just as well as you. I hated making up bulletin boards, so it was easy to get rid of that one. We had kids in our church who could organize our resource room. I didn’t enjoy that either. See what I mean? There are things you do that someone else could be doing better and would be blessed by doing it.
2. Remember, work smarter, not harder. Working smarter means you pray for wisdom from the Lord, and then you watch. As people serve, you will see their spiritual gifts manifest before your eyes. It is like a piece of a puzzle. As you see their gifts emerge, move them into their proper places of service in the body.
3. When people are faithful in smaller things, trust them with bigger things. You do not want to move too quickly. So, ask children and leaders to do smaller tasks first, and incorporate accountability. Once they’ve proven themselves, move them to a higher level of responsibility.
4. There are a lot smarter people in your church than you are. I used to think that I was “all that and a bag of chips.” Then I realized that there were doctors, teachers, bankers, real estate agents, and other professionals working with me. They bring a lot of wisdom and knowledge to the table. They are also natural leaders who can take the lead and be a huge blessing to you and others.
5. Remember, your calling is to equip the saints to do the work. Once you have fulfilled your calling, you will have time to seek the Lord for vision. Let someone else teach that small group, and then you can walk around and visit and minister to parents.

At the last church where I served, I put this practice into place. I basically worked myself out of a job!

• We were in eleven public schools with afterschool Bible clubs.
• Our Wednesday evening was booming with a very large number of children attending. Our ratio of kids to adults was about one leader to five children.
• Our Sunday morning was fully covered as well.
• We were taking more than 90 preteens on a summer mission trip every summer.
• We took two full buses to children’s camp each summer as well.
• We also had a bus ministry and leaders who ran the whole ministry.

The minister over me (my boss) at the time came to me and said,

“The personnel committee is concerned about your ministry. They want to know what you are doing. It doesn’t appear that you are doing much.”

Well, I laid it out for them. In each ministry area that I was responsible for, I had excellent leadership. I invested time in them and properly trained them. I released them, and it was their ministry.

After the personnel committee saw my report, they never questioned what I was doing again.

When I left the church some years later, I had all of my bases covered. It did not fall apart right after I left.

I want to say, I understand what you are going through, and I am here to help. My passion and mission for my life is to help churches advance the kingdom of God by properly equipping leaders to fulfill their calling.

I am here for you. Please feel free to contact me at This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it..

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We are excited that you will be joining thousands of leaders who have undergone our Empowering The Next Generation Training Course. We pray that the Lord will inspire you to reach children with the Gospel of Christ and disciple, equip, and release them so they can minister in the church and serve as missionaries of the Gospel. This training comes to you from 22+ years of experience using this ministry model. We invite you to read some of the many testimonies from leaders, parents, and students who have been impacted by this ministry.